Voiding

Haven't written in a while. Caught up in daily life. Life is mostly waking, meditating, yoga, dishwashing, swimming, then spending whatever time remains with others or by myself. Seems like I actually am alone very little these days, which is unusual for me. Been swimming much. Recently reached my goal of swimming 1000 meters. At the same time, I ate some food this past Friday that made me incredibly sick. It seems like I voided pounds and have been trying to regain my ability to eat. Its more like I am forcing myself as my stomach is incredibly sensitive right now. All you can do is stick with it and move through. I know all the work is worth it and while sometimes I fall short I keep moving, head down through a storm. Feel like this getting sick helped knocked me on my ass, forced me to rest a little, so that I can gear up and make a new push for a deeper dive. Finding the limitations, respecting and acknowledging them, then using them to descend to knew heights. Woman I met here is leaving in a few days. Going to the Caribbean to work for a friend. Will miss seeing her eyes and smile. Gave her a waterproof camera as a travel gift as she is a photographer. She smiled and it was worth it. Many of the international workers are leaving soon as their visas are expiring. Been great being with them as they are incredibly vivacious and warm. Will miss having them around. Not sure what I'll be doing next. Possibilities are in the air but I am not interested in forcing issues. When I know more, I'll know more. Doesn't feel like the right time to be pushing on this. There is other work to be done. Right now the order of the day seems to be rest. After posting this I'll be heading for the room for reading and sleeping. Tonight is Chinese night, as the International workers are cooking in the Employee Dining Room. Tomorrow is work. Looks like I'll get to do some bussing and hosting in the future, once they hire two new dishwashers. Can't go over overtime. Till then its life in the dishpit as they call it. Its an excellent place to be. Considered one of the worst jobs, I think its one of the best. The constant work gives you a chance to watch yourself, your energy, your moods as they rise and crest. The goal is to tighten things up so as the rises and falls level out and consistency, efficacy of motion and art and dance emerges. Some of the most beautiful things come out of the dirtiest places. Been that kind of week. Lots of voiding. Physical, emotional, energetic. Loss of control, loss of pain and fear. Exhausting and worthwhile. Sit still and watch the world move around you.

Picture taken by Paul Lovine on a full moon. In the background you can see the stars. Thanks Paul. http://www.flickr.com/photos/lovine/7950303966/in/photostream